Am I Not Tranny Enough?

Today I went to pick up the leather jockstrap I had ordered a wee while ago. Custom. Black. Leather. Jockstrap. (Yes, like a BOYS jockstrap. LIKE YOU MAKE FOR THE BOYS, the gayboys, the leather gay boys-- just to fit my figure.) Seemingly simple. There was even a picture on the website I was shown. Same thing, with a few minor adjustments.

For reasons unknown it appeared with a very shiny/patent red trim all around it, and nothing at all like the one on the website. Like a girly bikini, sort of, with a jock-strap back. AND RED SHININESS. I have no idea what I did to deserve this horror, apart from having the audacity to be born willy-less. He is changing the trim, thank the god-dess of gender-upending, and I have requested he 'butch it up a bit.' I live in hope.

Of course, the Monster's leather-goods are all black and buckly (if suffering other eccentricities-- what DO BOYS THINK WE 'GIRLS' DO???). Obviously she didn't get red trim or girliness, not when she goes about wearing them trousers all the time, not like me with my skirt-wearing and my curious lipstick. No. All of this from people I thought were 'family'.

Bloody hell. Some days I am tempted to just chuck it all in, start ticking the Miss box on forms and forget all about r/evolution. Its tedious, its really hard work and on certain nights when the lights are out I barely have the energy to even cry about it anymore. But then boys don't cry do they? I love my crew here and will be sad to leave, but I miss my queer family SO MUCH at times like this. Bah. Only four more sleeps.