Lusty Lady

Just came across this article Lusty Lady by Rachel Kramer Bussel at Village Voice:

Deciding to take a break is selfish on one level: it forces me to deal with what I like and don't like about myself, rather than trying to placate other people's perceptions. I've been told by people I've dated that I'm alternately "dating my writing" and being "overwhelming." While my first instinct was to even out whatever quirks I have, it's clear that I can't please everyone. I can only be myself, and yes, sometimes I get lost in my laptop and other times I act dorky and gushy, and I'll fill my lover's mailbox with cards and gifts. I've gone over these epithets countless times in my mind, trying to make them more palatable, trying to retrace my steps with these past partners to pinpoint exactly where the relationships, however casual, fell apart. Taking a pause from that pointless cycle of self-recrimination has freed me up to enjoy the people who are in my life, and really pay attention to my friends and family rather than just using them as sounding boards to help fix my issue du jour.

Its not all me, but much of it hits home. Have a read.