Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Queer Prom Blood and Bits


I did promise to write up the Queer Prom experience, so here it is. The space was beautifully decked out in shiny hearts and balloons and toilet paper streamers hanging from the rafters. The crowd were dressed magnificently, with more tulle and satin and ruffle and sparkle than I have seen in one place for a long time! Everyone sat around the edges of the dancefloor eyeing each other off before a few of the more brazen kiddies started dancing, just like at the only school dance I ever went to in my youth (Scrambletown, 1987 or so- St Pat's Ladies College girls teamed with St Greg's boys). Shows included some hula hooping, three kings doing Elvis, MC Gaylourdes and her lassoo, bands and one or two others I can't think of right now. Miss Finkle gave out detention slips and spankings with her plastic pearls, and Whoretic fluffed me on a bench. And then, of course, there was my show:

After much deliberation I with a Teen Mummy Mummy theme, so as to incorporate both unwed motherhood and slasher films. I believe it was Madam Phantasm who made the suggestion of using Madonna's 'Papa Don't Preach'- and it was perfect! As you can see in the pix, I wore a nice ruched aquamarine dress, plastic tiara, trashy pink makeup, bandages, granny knickers, boots, and my now-deceased blonde wig pinned to my head with 21g needles. And a baby bulge constructed from ziplock bags full of jelly, a couple of dental dams, jelly babies and vermicelli noodles soaked in red food colouring, all taped to my skin and covered with bandages. And I had a small plastic doll squished inserted where babies come from (hence Whoretic's fluffing of me earlier). Got ready much too early, and was the first time I had ever pierced my own head so I went a little deeper than usual, so it was a rather uncomfortable wait to get on stage. Then my waters broke, and I started to leak goo through my dress so I had to sneak on a bit earlier than I was supposed to. Came on stage drinking a bottle of Bombay Sapphire (it matched the dress) and lipsynching. Stripped off the dress, pulled a stanley knife from my bag and slashed open the bulge. Goo went everywhere! Yay! Threw goo around the place, ate some, then gave birth to doll. In the process her body fell off, so ended up with just a head in a condom, which wasn't a great deal of use as was planning to give her a blow job. Then I pulled the needles out of my head and my wig off and though I didn't bleed nearly as much as normal it was still quite gory. The crowd seemed to love it, which is always a relief. And apparently I won one of the Prom Queen positions but had already headed off to Zip with the Buxom Wench. Nice event, and looking forward to the reunion.

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