Saturday, February 10, 2007

Milk'N'Cookies




Rundown on last night's Velvet show...
Costumes: Whoretic was delightfully dressed in multiple 'flesh-toned' and pale pink sturdy foundation garments, a sweet little embroidered apron, pink headscarf, magnificently large hair, high heels with demure bows, a pink pout, an enormous pair of gold eyelashes and carried a picnic basket full of cookies. I was tastefully attired in 'flesh-toned' granny knickers, red and blue curlers, a blue headscarf, blue plastic beads, red collar, diamantes, red knee-high fishnets printed with blue and white flowers, black heels (ouch) and the piece de resistance- LactoBoobies constructed from plastic party-tits and baby bottles and attached to a red gingham apron.
Action: We wandered through the crowd offering people Milk'N'Cookies. If one accepted, and most did, Whoretic would place a cookie between her tits. Then after asking whether one preferred cow-milk or soy-juice, I would soak the cookie with it (and often much of Whoretic). Then the choice was theirs- either consume the cookies straight from her cleavage or use their fingers. Ended up very messy and sticky, but delicious!
All in all Velvet was quite a mixed bag. The crowd consisted of everything from punky baby dykes jumping about to the perfectly vanilla 'L-Word' lesbians chatting quietly on the couches, to leathered up Dykes On Bikes giving dancefloor spankings to older corporate lesbians watching on with bemused looks. Entertainment was fantastic- Ali and Gaylourdes set up a Glamorisation Station in the foyer and performed shiny sparkly makeovers, Lisa hula-hooped and Ange tissu-d (is that a word?) , a Motown cover band called the Super Supremes, DJ Sveta, us roving and it all ended with a gorgeous couple of andro-king-gendermucking cuties transforming themselves on stage.

After that Gaylourdes and I ran off to The Final Kooky at Club 77. Kept my rollers in (which prompted much flattering comment), and my heels on (which prompted me dancing like a wannabe drag queen). It was so packed that there was a line half-way down the block, which we avoided by fabulousness and audacity, and when we got in it was so hot I could barely breathe. I danced, splashed myself with water, guzzled lots of water, smoked too much, didn't drink alcohol, danced, chatted etc etc. Stayed until the very very very end *sob*, then cabbed home for some shut-eye.

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