Thursday, September 20, 2007

'I Want A Girl...

Just like the girl
Who married dear old Dad'

Or so the song goes. And the older I get, the more it dawns on me that I am looking for someone a lot like my dad. Which is not a bad thing at all (my father being a nice variety of bloke). So, here is my current wish list of partner-features, in not much particular order. Some of it is influenced by my old man, and some is influenced by folk I have known and loved and lusted. And some of it is essential, and some is just a bonus:

Funny. Appreciates the absurd. And British comedies.
Loyal. Won't just run at the first sign of trouble. Willing to work at relationships.
Dependable. Will turn up for dinner before it burns.
Polite. Says thankyou for kind gestures. Apologises for mistakes. Holds doors open for others and RSVPs when asked.
Honest. Never minds the bollocks.
Decent. Even when being distinctly indecent.
Brings me flowers. Yes, I am a shameless romantic.
Brings poppers. Yes, I am a shameless faggot.
Switches.
Likes to give a good spanking. With or without leather gloves.
Capable. Of making own money. Of cooking and cleaning. Of fixing stuff. And is willing to do it.
Is physically stronger than me. And plays on the fact.
Family-oriented. Whether biological family or logical family, appreciates the benefits of kinship.
Not only can read, but likes to and does.
Generally optimistic. Accepts responsibility for own happiness.
Not afraid to work up a sweat. Or get hands dirty. And not afraid to stay sweaty and dirty.
Likes body hair. On both of us.
Energetic. Can keep up the pace.
Has own interests. And mates.
Willing to lead me by my choke chain/leash in public.
Smells like WD40 and salt.
Secure. Not threatened by creativite fits, large libidos or bears in tutus.
Genderqueer. Healthy disrespect for binaries.
Appreciates the benefits of a good lube. And that saliva is by far the sexiest.
Smiles a lot.
Flags yellow, either side. Black on the left. And red on the right. Willing to negotiate.
Omnisexual. And happy to cruise gay bars together, alone.
Has a c*&t and isn't afraid to use it, one way or another.
Passionate. Openly and joyously.
Can spit polish boots.
Can spit polish Zoo.
Knows that nice girls don't spit.
Is fond of beer and BBQs.
Willing to consider children. Not necessarily 'our own' either.
Likes to watch. And assist.
Owns a big dog or two.
Modified. Pierced, tattooed, surgically altered, chemically enhanced, branded, scarred, built.
Happy to holiday in a tent, spending days splashing in the ocean and beating about the bush.
Makes good coffee and porridge.
Willing to co-top willing bottoms.
Has an affinity for fluids.
Can skip stones and spot shooting stars.

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