Sunday, July 08, 2007

Sex And Dying In High Society

You say it's good enough
You say your pain is better
Than any kind of love
That's sex and dying in high society

- X
'Sex And Dying In High Society'

A few years ago I appeared in a documentary called Liberty In Restraint, which was about the life of fetish photographer Noel Graydon. I did a very funny medical/piercing/electric play scene with him and Puck, which was just pure silliness (for the film), and another photo shoot with Noel later. He was a joy to work with, gentle and polite and soft, and over the years whenever I encountered him out and about we had a good old chat. And now I open up my emails tonight and find out that he is dead. Asthma.

WHAT IS GOING ON HERE??? I am almost beginning to get spooked. Yes, every day lots of people get run over and killed or diagnosed with cancer, or have surgery or fatal asthma attacks. But there seems to be an uncommon amount of death and disease around my communities and friendship circles at the moment...

J's wake at Phoenix last night was a true indication of just how special and loved she was to so many people. The energy was overwhelming, and I danced almost non-stop until dawn with a group of my nearest and dearest. For most of the night we were up the front, then somehow right at the end we moved over to 'my' old corner, the one where the girls would congregate when I very first came out queer clubbing. And then it happened. The music was hard and dirty, I was exhausted and topless (though not very drunk- actually managed not to get too messy at all), and I was in the middle of Beculum and Ali and The Dancing Diva and ButchBitch and the Ts and assorted other folk I love and there was that moment. When everything seems to stop for a split second and you realise that even if things aren't how you think you would like them to be they are somehow as they should be. When the lights came on we went back to DD's apartment and while the others drank and smoked and chatted I fell asleep on the floor. Was woken up when time to get a cab, and have some vague recollection of being SOOOOOOO HAPPY and babbling that I had just been having a VERY good dream. Really wish I could remember what it was :)

Spent today, like yesterday, hanging out with Aunty C, watching Tales Of The City DVDs and being waited on by her dear sweet mother. Tea and chokky bikkies and soup and fruit toast and huddling next to the heater and dozing on and off in front of the telly. Ah, this headcold is horrific. Have barely stopped sneezing or blowing my nose all day, which is a change from the relentless cough I had yesterday I suppose. Blah. More vitamins and tissues and hot drinks and bedrest and hot water bottles. But it could be worse.



Blogger mayhem said...

Glad that last night was a special as it should have been. that's FCKKD about ANOTHER friend dying - I decided last time I endured a spate of carking amigos that belief in a malevolent bigotted deity *made sense*. hell! - it explains John howard and only gives me more reason to keep on living *WELL* - and stay away from whatever heaven the Cretinous godbotherers believe in. Hang in there - and maybe we need an onion party for those sinuses of yours.


12:57 am  

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